Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
by BitOBonesFluff
Summary: It's almost Christmas. Brennan has decided it will be a quiet family day, but Booth has other plans, which she is about to find out about. It's going to be a Christmas Booth style.
1. But We Agreed, Didn't We?

"Bones, so I've been thinking" Booth started to speak, his voice modulated, low. He unclipped his wristwatch and placed it carefully in the jewellery caddy on the top of the chest of drawers. He slipped the St Christopher medallion on the silver chain over his head and let it drop slowly into velvet lining, it curled like a snake as he lowered his hand. He removed the cufflinks one by one, placing them next to the medallion and then pulled the tie clip from his tie and set that down methodically next to the cufflinks.

He turned and looked at his wife as she unzipped her dress and let it slip from her shoulders.

"Bones? Were you listening?" he asked, pulling a set of dice from his pocket and placing them on the corner of the chest of drawers with one hand. The other hand extracted two gambling chips and his one year GA medallion from the other pocket, and setting them next to the dice.

Brennan turned and smiled at Booth as she stepped out of her navy blue dress and bent down to pick it up. "Yes, of course! I'm in the room Booth." She responded as she walked over to the walk in dressing room, grabbed a hanger and proceeded to hang the dress neatly before hanging it back on the rail.

"I was just checking. You have a habit of switching off after a long day. I've told you things, and then had you accuse me of not telling you later on." Booth said, defensively holding a hand out, palm turned upwards. "Anyway," he said unbuttoning his trousers and letting them drop to the floor, kicking them to the side of the room and walking over to her in his boxers. His feet still encased in his shoes and a pair of bright yellow, orange and green striped socks.

"Booth! Please?" Brennan said, her frustration at his disregard for his clothing bubbling over.

"What? They're dirty. I'll pick them up later. Look, Bones. I wanted to talk to you about Christmas this year. You know, it's getting close and we haven't really talked about what we're going to do this year." he said.

"I was under the impression we were going to have a quiet, understated Christmas celebration this year, avoiding all the chaos that seems to surround the twenty fifth of December. I have to say, I'm glad. Being at home, just you, me, the children. Treating it just like another day" she said, pulling a gown over her slip.

Booth sat down on the bed and stared at her, using his toes to force one shoe off without undoing the laces, then repeating the process, accidentally kicking the shoe across towards the wall. "Yeah. About that. I've been thinking" he muttered.

"Oh no. Booth! Booth, we discussed this! No over the top, expensive, Christmas celebration. No ridiculous spending on things that the children don't need. No overeating until you feel ill. Just you, me, the children, a light dinner, a quiet glass of wine." Brennan rolled her eyes and sat down heavily next to him. "We talked about this" she said again.

"Bones. It's Christmas. I know I said I'd try. But. It's Christmas!" he whined, his brown eyes glistening and his mouth downturned into a sad and sorry pout.

"Booth"she said, her frustration clear.

Brennan had told Booth several months ago that she didn't want to get caught up in all the hype that surrounded Christmas. The tree, the home decorating, the expensive gifts. Their children wanted for nothing. Booth had the worst habit of bringing home the latest Barbie for Christine, or the newest baby toy for their son Hank, for no real reason, other than that he loved them, and he loved playing with them. And she hated cooking, truth be told. She would rather sit down to a cold, fresh salad, then deal with the smells of meat cooking, and the fatty, heavy sides that accompanied, as Booth referred to it, a real homestyle celebration dinner. And she was certain that he had agreed with her.

"Bones, hon. Come on. You love it. I know you do. The smell of the perfect pine tree, decorated with all the beautiful ornaments we've collected, and the ones that Christine made at school. You love driving down our drive and seeing the glinting christmas lights and the snow on the roof."

Brennan rolled her eyes at Booth "That's not actual snow. You spray that powder stuff all over our roof and then when Christmas is over, you spend weeks cleaning it off. We haven't had actual snow on Christmas for years."

"But this year, they're forecasting it Bones. I saw it on the TV earlier today. The long range forecast said chance of snow was eighty percent!"

"And that means there is a twenty percent chance that it will not snow. It will probably just rain, or simply just be cold."

Booth forged ahead "And the smell of the turkey cooking, the veggies roasting, the gravy. Oh the gravy, Bones!" he paused for a moment, eyes closed, imagining that thick, rich, brown gold, sliding over his dinner. He opened his eyes to see Brennan smirking at him, "And the looks on Christine and Hank's little faces when they come into the living room on Christmas morning, and see that Santa has been!" he added.

"You mean the look on your face when you see their faces" Brennan smiled lovingly. She shook her head and looked up at the ceiling. There was no winning this one. Christmas really was one of Booth's favourite days of the year. She should have known better than to think that he would actually go ahead with a low key, quiet day, with no friends, no decorations, no elaborate meal.

She released a heavy sigh.

Booth grabbed her and hugged her hard "Oh I knew you would agree!" he said, not needed her to say anything. "It'll be great. And I'll do the cooking. You won't have to do a thing. Not a thing!" he said as he jumped up and held his hands out to her "I've already thought about the tree. I'm going to go out next week and I'm going to chop down my own tree"

"No, wait, Booth. Why don't you just go to the tree farm and buy one that has already been chopped down, cleaned and prepped. All you have to do is find a nice six foot tall fir."

Booth stared at her, his face long, his eyelids blinking over and over.

Brennan forced herself to look away. "And stop making that face"

"What face?" Booth asked innocently, knowing full well the effectiveness of his puppy dog eyes.

"Fine. Fine! It doesn't matter what I say, you'll go ahead and do what you want. But please. Don't get carried away and bring home a twenty foot tall tree like you did two years ago. Honestly, it was so embarrassing. You had to chop off the bottom and it was still too tall, the top was curled against the ceiling and the star was sideways!"

Booth held up both hands, palms forwards "I hear you. Massive miscalculation on my part." He then covered his heart with one hand "I promise you. I will measure the tree properly and we won't have the Godzilla tree this year. Absolutely I hear you. In fact. What if I take Max with me?" he asked, eyes wide, innocent.

Brennan looked at him, her eyes squinting "You've already arranged it, haven't you?" she asked.

Booth turned and bent over, retrieving his shoes and taking them into the walk in robe, making sure not to make eye contact.

"Booth?" she said his name firmly.

"Is that Hank?" Booth popped his head out of the dressing room, one hand cupped behind his ear.

"Booth?" Brennan said, standing up, hands on her hips.

"Yep. I'm sure that's Hank. I'll just. Uh" he stepped past Brennan as quickly as he could without looking at her. "Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm just. He probably needs something. Be right back!" he mumbled quickly as he exited the bedroom.

Brennan stared after him and took a deep breath and held it, eyes closed as she rubbed at her neck. Her husband and her father together, tree chopping, was a disaster waiting to happen. She wasn't sure exactly when their friendship solidified. The moment must have slipped past her when she wasn't looking. One day Booth was a by the book FBI agent slamming Max against a wall, frisking him, then locking his hands behind him in cuffs. And the next they were bonding over babies, and weddings and now Christmas.

She remembered at their wedding, Max had called Booth son. And from that moment onwards, he had treated him as an ally and a confidante. They spent days with Christine, playing tea parties. They built a tree house for her. They took her out tadpoling at the local dam. Then when Hank came along, Max and Booth were all macho, chest puffing , proud men handing out cigars and clapping each other on the back. It was unnerving.

Brennan walked over and bent down to pick up Booth's trousers. She pulled the belt from the loops and dropped it on the bed. She walked out of the bedroom and wandered down the hallway to the laundry. She passed the nursery where Hank slept. She could hear Booth talking to their son. It would be his second Christmas this year.

Last year Christmas had been exciting as it was Hanks first one. He was almost one, crawling and full of curiosity. The day was chaotic to say the least. People were coming and going all day. Booth drank way too much egg nogg, and beer, and wine with dinner. Christine made herself sick eating too much dessert. And Hank was just so wound up, he cried all night and she got absolutely no sleep, only to get up the next morning and have to clean everything up by herself because Booth was so ill.

She shook her head and continued down the hallway to the laundry and dropped Booths pants into the hamper. She walked back towards the kitchen and almost bumped into Booth as he came out of Hanks room carrying their son. He had grown so much. He was almost two, and was walking and he'd started saying baby words. In fact his first word was bone. It had made her so proud, and Booth jealous. He wanted DaDa to be Hank's first word. Of course, Booth had argued that Hank was copying him calling her Bones, but Brennan insisted that he had been paying attention when she was talking about her work. They had agreed to disagree.

Hank reached towards his mother, his little hands opening and closing "Bone!" he said grinning.

Booth gave his cheek a big wet smooch kiss "That's right! That's Bones!" he laughed.

Brennan frowned as she lifted Hank from his father's arms "Booth I don't want him calling me that." she said, looking into her son's eyes "Mama. Say Mama Hank. I'm Ma Ma. Say it"

"Bone!" Hank cried, grabbing Brennan's cheeks and pressing his open mouth against her lips to give her a sloppy baby kiss.

Booth burst out laughing "Told ya!" he boomed as he walked towards the living room.

He looked at the clock. "I better go get Christine from Angela's. Max will be here soon." he said.

Brennan hitched Hank onto one hip, settling his weight as comfortably as she could "So Max is coming here? Now?" she asked, her head tilted to one side.

Booth stopped and turned around to look at her, his lips clamped together.

"It's fine Booth. You and Max are buddies and you're going tree hunting together." she said.

"I told him he could stay here until after Christmas too. Gotta go get Christine! Bye!" he said quickly and exited through the front door as fast as he could pulling it closed behind him.

"Wait! Booth! What?" Brennan yelled after him. But of course he was gone.

She stood staring at the closed door, then swing Hank around onto her other hip "So, did you know about this arrangement with Max too Hank?" she asked her son.

"Poppy!" Hank yelled.

Brennan laughed "Yes. Poppy Max is coming to stay. Apparently. Looks like we're definitely not having a quiet Christmas this year. " She arched her back and then lowered Hank to the floor "You young man, are getting way too heavy to be carried around. You're going to be built like your father. And that's definitely not a bad thing. Your father has a very pleasing body shape and size. Girls like that in a man. You'll find out one day." she said to her son who giggled and crawled a few feet, then pushed himself up onto his feet and toddled over to his toy box. "Let's hope you don't have his stubborn streak" she added.

"Dada! Poppy!" Hank said, dribbling onto a teddy bear he had pulled from the box.

"Yes. Daddy invited Poppy Max to come and stay. I see you've been talking to him. You probably know all about his Christmas plans too" she muttered. "Must be that thing about the boy code, that Booth talks about. You know, there can be a Mommy & Son code too. We'll have to work on that" she said, smiling.

"Bone!" Hank laughed.

"Mama Hank. Mama" Brennan said leaning down and wiping the drool from his chin "Say Mama"

Hank grabbed her hand and laughed his cheeky baby laugh that she loved so much. "Bone" he said again.

"We'll have to work on that Hank" she said as she stood up. "One man in this family calling me that is quite enough" she said, sighing.


	2. From Zero To Sixty

Booth and Brennan were having a late dinner. Christine had eaten earlier and was now in bed asleep. She had come home from Angela's exhausted after swimming lessons with Michael Vincent. Brennan had bathed her and put her to bed while Booth had cooked dinner.

Booth sat at the head of the table humming what Brennan assumed was a Christmas carol, although it was beyond her which one it was. Booth's ability to carry a tune was questionable at best, although that never stopped him bursting into song whenever one of his favourite songs came on the radio. And of course, there was _their_ song, Hot Blooded, which he always sang with great gusto, and a disregard for the actual words. She smiled to herself as he passed her the bowl of mashed potatoes.

"I think I outdid myself tonight Bones!" he said, grinning at her as he picked up a chicken leg and bit into it.

"Bone!" Hank squealed, holding out a chubby hand towards his mother, fingers opening and closing.

"See what I mean?" Brennan said, shoulders slumping, her eyes wide, mouth downturned. "He keeps calling me that!" she said as she handed him a piece of chicken thigh meat to chew on.

Booth laughed loudly "Aww come on Bo, um, what do you want me to call you then? I've called you Bones for years! I can't just start calling you Temperance. You're Bones! You're my Bones!" Booth suddenly sobered.

Brennan tilted her head to one side and stared at this man. He was right. He'd only called her Temperance a handful of times in all their years together. Twice, when she was distressed. His use of her Christian name soothed and calmed her. And on the day they were married. It would seem odd if he suddenly began calling her Temperance. She doubted she would respond if he called out to her using her name.

"Well. Maybe, when we're with Hank, you can call me Mommy or even Mama. Just until he gets the gist of calling me that?" she said slowly, thoughtfully.

Booth burst out laughing again, then, seeing her face "You're not kidding? You want me to call you Mommy whenever Hank is present?"

"Yes" Brennan said in all seriousness.

Booth frowned and leaned his elbow on the table and cupped his chin in his hand, staring at her. "It really bothers you that much that he doesn't call you Mommy?" he asked

Brennan nodded.

"Well then Mommy. Hank and I will make sure that we call you by your right name! Won't we Hank?" Booth said, leaning towards his son and picking a bit of chicken off his cheek "We want to keep Mommy happy, don't we fella".

Hank banged his hands on the tray of his high chair and looked at Brennan "More!" he demanded, both hands pumping open and closed as he reached towards the whole roast chicken on the table.

"Mommy will get you some, but can you say Mommy? Hank? Mommy?" she said as she picked another piece of chicken from the carcass for him, and added a piece of roast potato to his bowl.

Hank was focussed on his food "chick" he said holding up a piece of chicken, then popped it into his mouth.

Brennan smiled and looked at Booth "I'm worrying about nothing, aren't I?" she said.

Booth grinned at her. "I think you might be. But if it makes you happy."

He looked at his son who was chewing happily on his food. "Boy's got an appetite. He's growing fast, isn't he?" he said.

Brennan smiled and nodded her agreement "He certainly is. Which reminds me. I need to take him shopping for new shoes tomorrow."

"Shoes!" Hank echoed.

Booth frowned "Didn't you just buy him new shoes a few weeks ago?"

"I did, but he's had a growth spurt and they don't fit him anymore. I suspect he's going to have big feet like his Daddy. Aren't you Hank?" she said, grabbing at Hank's bare foot.

"Feet Mama" Hank giggled pulling his foot out of Brennan's hand.

She looked up at Booth, eyes wide "Did you hear that? He said Mama! Hank! You said Mama!" she laughed.

"Bone!" Hank laughed.

"It's a work in progress Bo. Mommy" Booth said, shaking his head and forking a whole roast potato into his mouth, which he chewed with a big grin on his face.

They finished their meal, Hank spread half of his onto the tray of his high chair. Booth lifted Hank out of his seat and received a chicken and potato kiss on his cheek for his trouble. Brennan grabbed a handful of paper towel and began cleaning up the highchair while Booth took Hank into the bathroom to wash up his face and hands. He popped him down onto the floor, holding him until Hank got his balance, then followed him down the hallway to the living room as he toddled along on his bare feet.

Brennan was waiting with two large glasses of red wine and they sat down together on the sofa, to watch their son playing.

"So. You're going to go buy shoes tomorrow?" Booth asked.

"Yes. He'll need them for Christmas day." She replied, sipping at her wine.

"About Christmas. I invited Aubrey. He's got nobody else." Booth said.

Brennan nodded "Of course! I would hate to think of him being alone on Christmas"

Booth squinted at her "But you wanted to be alone on Christmas. Just us. Quiet day. No fuss" he said.

"Yes, but that's different. We wouldn't be alone. We would be together. James is literally, on his own. He would end up eating at the diner, or worse, eating a burger alone in his apartment, watching It's A Beautiful Life on repeat" Brennan said.

Booth laughed loudly.

"It's not funny Booth. Too many people spend Christmas completely alone." she said.

"I know it's not funny. It's just that you've done a complete three sixty. Anyway, it'll be good having him here. Christine adores him, and he'll be more than happy to sit on the floor and play with Hank while the grownups sit at the table and drink the wine he will bring." Booth smirked.

Brennan raised an eyebrow. "That's not very nice Booth. But you raise a good point. He has terrible taste in whiskey, but he really knows his red wine." Brennan grinned along with him.

"So, there will be you, me, Max, Aubrey and the kids" Booth said, pulling a pen and notepad from his shirt pocket.

Brennan shuffled in her seat and held her glass up to her mouth "and Angela and Jack and Michael Vincent" she said into the glass, muffling her voice.

"Say what?" Booth asked, turning to look at her.

Brennan held the glass in front of her face, sipping at her wine for a moment, then dropped it down "I invited Angela and Jack and Michael Vincent. I didn't know you were inviting Aubrey. But it will be fine. We can add another table onto the end of the dining table and extend into the living room. And Angela will bring the ham and sweet potatoes and Jack's famous gravy." she said.

"But I make the best gravy, Bones. Mommy. He's not listening. Bones, I make the gravy" he repeated.

"Well, they offered and I accepted. You can make yours too. There's no gravy law that says you can only have one jug of gravy on the table is there?" Brennan said.

"Just as long as you know, I will be making _my_ famous gravy." Booth said sulkily as he jotted notes on his pad. "Max is going to help me on the day cooking the meat. Which reminds me, I'll need to ring up the butcher and order extra." he noted that on his pad.

"Shall we buy dessert from that bakery downtown?" Brennan asked.

The phone began to ring. "yeah, I guess that would be a good idea. Booth." he said into the phone. "Max! Hi, we were just making some plans for Christmas day. We've got a few extra's it seems. Wait. What? Uh, sure I guess. Seeing as you've already invited them. Christmas Eve? Are they. Great. No. No. Why would I be annoyed that Russ and his wife and two girls are coming Christmas Eve and will be happy to bunk down in our living room" he glared at Brennan.

"Give me the phone" she hissed. "Booth" Brennan stood up and walked over to him, hand outstretched.

"Right. Sure. OK. Yes, the more the merrier. I'll talk to you tomorrow Max. You still need me to pick you up from the bus station? At two? OK. Sure. Seeya." Booth hung up the phone "Oh My God, this is crazy!" he said to Brennan. "We need to rethink this whole thing."

"Russ is coming? That's wonderful! We haven't seen them for years! Russ has been so busy with his business. I did speak to Amy a few months ago on the phone. Emma and Hayley are growing up so quickly. This is wonderful Booth! My whole family will be together for Christmas!" Brennan said, her eyes shining.

"You don't think it's going to be too much? Maybe you can call Angela and tell her about Russ and Amy and the girls. They won't mind, will they?" Booth said, trying to work out in his head where he was going to sit everyone.

"Don't be ridiculous. You cannot take back a Christmas day invitation. I wouldn't. They're our best friends. And Russ and Amy and the girls are family. And Aubrey is like family. We'll work it out." Brennan said, taking the pen and paper out of Booth's hands and making her own notes.

The phone began ringing again.

"Don't answer it!" Booth yelled.

Hank started crying, frightened by his father's loud voice.

Booth picked him up and began bouncing him up and down "There, there buddy. Sorry buddy." he started walking towards the hallway "I'm taking him to bed. Don't answer "

"Too late" Brennan said as she picked up the phone and waved it at him.

Booth rolled his eyes and walked towards the nursery, clucking and bouncing Hank.

He came back to the living room fifteen minutes later, to see Brennan with a large sheet of paper on the coffee table, writing furiously.

"Hank's quiet" Brennan said.

"He fell asleep the minute I put him in his bed. What exactly are you doing? And who was on the phone? Or don't I want to know?" Booth said quickly, running his questions together.

Brennan kept writing "It's a seating plan. That was Aubrey on the phone. You don't want to know" she said looking up, then said "He's bringing Jessica. She's making dessert" she said determinedly biting on the end of the pencil.

Brennan put the pencil down on the table and looked up at Booth, who looked ill. "Booth. It's going to be fine. We just need to move the living room furniture down to the end of the room, we can hire a long trestle table and extra chairs. See? We've done this before. Remember that time we had Christmas at my apartment? We had almost this many people and it worked fine. And we managed just fine at Thanksgiving with all the extra's." she said, grinning.

Now that it was happening, she could see it in her mind. The children coming down the corridor to find their Uncle and Auntie and cousins there. Poppy Max would be there too, and Uncle Jack, Auntie Angela and Michael Vincent would arrive mid morning. And Christine would be over the moon that Uncle James and Jessica will be in attendance as well. She started to feel quite celebratory.

"We'll have to put some fold out cots in Christine's room. We don't want the girls being in the room where the Christmas tree is. How will _Santa_ deliver all the presents if they're there" she said using air quotes.

"When is Dad arriving?" she asked. "Two o'clock?" she added.

Booth nodded.

"Great, after you pick him up, can you go to the market and order the extra produce we will need. Ask for Randy. He knows me and will make sure we get the best quality. And then you might need to go past the store and grab some wine, spirits and soft drinks. And maybe I'll write you a list so you can get the items from the supermarket that don't require refrigeration. That will save some time on Christmas Eve." Brennan said, not looking up from her notes.

"uh, we have to go get the Christmas tree " Booth started to speak.

"Oh! You may need to cut back on the size of the tree. Just because of space issues. And now that Russ and the girls are coming. I'll need to get gifts for them all. Don't worry. I'll take care of that."

"Big of you" Booth muttered. He could feel his vision of Christmas Day slipping away and being replaced with an extravaganza of Brennan proportions. "I should have gone along with quiet day plans. This has gone from zero to sixty in seconds" he thought out loud.

"Sorry? Did you say something" Brennan asked, her voice bright and exuberant.

"Me? No. Just agreeing with you" Booth said, knowing that there was no other choice.

"Don't worry. I'll have a detailed shopping list ready for you tomorrow." she said smiling.

"OK Bones" Booth said, feeling completely helpless. This wasn't going to be quite the Christmas he was envisaging after all.


	3. The Perfect Plan

"Max! Over here!" Booth called out as he saw Max retrieve his bag and turn around.

Max lifted his arm, his overcoat slung over it, and waved a gloved hand. Booth nodded and slowly wove his way through the throng of people who were greeting their own family and friends in the bus station.

"Booth! Good to see you son." Max said grinning at the man who had made his daughter happier than he had ever known her to be.

Booth reached down and pulled the bag handle from his father in law's hand, and his arm was pulled down slightly.

"What the hell are you carrying in here? Bricks?" he asked, surprised at the weight of the bag.

Max shook his head and clapped Booth on the back as he walked beside him "Just a few gifts" he laughed.

"A few?" Booth asked incredulously, feeling the weight of the bag as he lifted it up and then let it drop again.

Max simply smiled "So tell me, how's Tempe and my grand children? he asked.

Booth leaned into the door that lead out into the carpark and held it open for Max who followed him through it. "She's good actually. Christine is excited to see you. Be prepared. She has literally hundreds of drawings to show you, and a new board game to play with you. Clue. I should warn you, for a six year old, she's ruthless."

Max looked at him, surprise showing on his face. "But isn't she a bit young for that game?"

Booth shrugged and weaved his way through the parked cars to his vehicle. He opened the back door and heaved Max's bag onto the back seat. "Well the game is rated for ages eight and above, but of course, Bones insisted that her powers of deduction will become enhanced by playing it, and of course, she never makes it easy for Christine." he said.

Max opened the passenger door and slid into the front seat, pulling the door closed. Booth slipped into the drivers seat and secured his seat belt.

"Ah yes. Tempe never made it easy for anyone when playing board games. Poor Russ. She would absolutely annihilate him at Battleship. Her argument was that he didn't have very good logic or critical thinking, and therefore she would always win." Max said grinning.

Booth grinned "I tried to let Christine win at Hungry Hungry Hippos and Bones told me off. She said that Christine's motor skills and competitive nature wouldn't develop properly if I didn't push her to compete properly. And that this would then affect her academically when it came to striving to be top of her class." he said, pulling a face and rolling his eyes. "or something like that. I kind of zoned out after she told me off" he added.

Max looked down at his hands, knuckles swollen and starting to become misshapen. He intertwined his fingers and flexed them in front of himself, trying to force them straight. "That's our Tempe" he said, smiling to himself. "And what about our little man?" he asked, turning to look at Booth.

"Oh he's great. He's so big now. Starting to talk." Booth looked over his shoulder then quickly pulled out into the traffic. "Funniest thing. He's been calling Bones, Bones! It's driving her crazy. She wants him to call her Mommy or Mama, but the little monster just won't do it."

Booth stopped speaking for a minute as he braked hard, as another driver pulled into his lane. He flicked his hand at the windscreen "You crazy moron! Indicate! So many idiots on the road Max. Honestly, I swear that when Christine turns sixteen and comes to ask me to teach her to drive, I may just lock her in her room for three or four years" he said, pulling across towards the turn off. "Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Hank won't call her Mommy, so now I have to call her Mommy when Hank is in the room, so that he stops mimicking me. Can you believe that?"

Max stared at Booth for a moment then burst out laughing "Oh Booth" he chuckled, tears streaming from the corners of his eyes "I absolutely can believe it. I really can."

They chatted about mundane things as Booth took a turn into Schneiders, stopping briefly to run in and buy four cases of beer, two of wine, several bottles of spirits and a dozen mixers. He half ran across the parking lot, pushing the trolley loaded up with alcohol to the back of the car, opening the trunk and depositing the cases, securing them with an elastic net to stop them sliding around. He jumped back into the driver's seat and looked at Max.

"Just one of the items on Bones' to do list. Which apparently I am to do" he said pressing the ignition.

Max smiled and leaned back in his seat. "One?" he asked.

Booth raised an eyebrow "One. Next is Fresh Farm market. Gotta put in the order for the fresh produce for Christmas Day with _Randy_." he said, exaggerating the name. " Thankfully, they will deliver. For a price of course." he said.

"Doesn't everyone?" Max chimed in.

He drove for about six or seven minutes and pulled into the parking lot of the market. "Be right back" he said as he jumped out of the car. He began to run towards the door, then Max saw him stop, begin patting at his chest and pockets, then run back to the car and pull open the door. He reached over towards Max and shoved his hand underneath Max's butt, rummaged around for a minute, then pulled it out, a sheet of paper in his hand. "List" he puffed. Then slammed the car door and ran back towards the doors of the market, leaving Max sitting in the car, stifling a chuckle.

After about ten minutes, Booth came lurching across the parking lot and pulled open the car door and landed heavily in the seat, puffing. "OK. One more stop. You can come with me and help." He said, pointing at Max, as he swallowed and started the car.

"If I might ask?" Max said. "Why so much alcohol and food? There's only you, Tempe, the kids, me, Russ and his family." he said.

Booth burst out laughing. Sounding almost maniacal. "Oh if only! No. No Max. We also have Jack and Angela and their son because Bones didn't want them to be alone on Christmas because Angela's father is overseas. AND, we have Aubrey and Jessica too." he said, grinning like a crazy man because I invited them, thinking we were only going to have a small Christmas.

Max swallowed and nodded, then turned and stared out the window. "Booth. I need to tell you something." He said quietly.

Booth was concentrating on the traffic, muttering _Whole Foods, when I could have easily just dropped into the local Safeway, but no. Bones insists on shopping at Whole Foods_

Max quickly glanced over at him, then looked back out the window "Margaret and her husband and new baby are coming too. It's going to be a surprise for Tempe." he said quickly, his voice low.

 _The food at Whole Foods is fresher than at Safeway. Which is ridiculous because we're only buying canned and packaged foods. But Bones insists on getting what Bones_ "What?" Booth stopped muttering, suddenly registering that Max had spoken. "What did you just say?" he asked again.

Max shifted his weight in the car seat, moving closer to the door, trying to put a little distance between him and Booth.

"Uh. Oh. Yeah. I may have told Margaret I was coming for Christmas, and she thought it would be a great surprise for Tempe if she and Barry and little Marcie turned up for a Christmas surprise." he said to the window, then turned and looked at Booth, "Surprise!" he said, forcing a wide smile.

Booth turned and stared ahead at the traffic, then starting slamming his hand against the steering wheel.

"Booth. Stop! You're doing to break the wheel!" Max cried, honestly worried.

Booth kept driving, both hands gripping the steering wheel so tight, his knuckles went white. He pulled into the parking lot of the supermarket, tyres squealing as he took the turn quicker than Max liked, then braked hard, sending Max forwards. The seatbelt holding him back from hitting the dashboard.

Booth turned and pointed at Max, his finger trembling. "You. Get out of the car."

"Booth. Son. It's only two extra people. The baby" he started.

"Get. Out." Booth said slowly.

Max swallowed hard and exited the car, fully expecting Booth to drive away. But, to his surprise, Booth got out and grabbed a trolley and started stomping towards the supermarket doors. He yelled back over his shoulder. "Don't just stand there! We have a list to fill!"

Max stood still for a moment, then jumped and walked as quickly as his knees would allow him, following Booth to the doors where Booth shoved the trolley towards him and simply said "Follow me"

Booth checked off all the items on the list carefully. In some instances adding extra items, in light of Max's revelation that there were going to be even more people at his table on Christmas Day.

They loaded the grocery bags into the car and Booth stood, hand on the door and looked at Max "You're not going to spring anyone else on me, right?" he asked.

"Booth, I swear, that's it." he replied, both hands raised up in surrender.

Booth stood staring across the car at him, then nodded and got into the car. "Let's get this all home. It's still got to be unpacked and then I am going to have a ridiculously large drink." he said.

* * *

"Poppy Max!" Christine squealed as she ran out of the front door and up to the car as Booth pulled into their driveway.

Max couldn't get out of the car quickly enough "There's my little chicken!" he said, grabbing Christine under the arms and lifting her up with a loud groan. "You've grown so much! I won't be able to pick you much longer!" he said kissing her cheek.

"Oh Poppy Max. You're funny. I've got drawings for you. And we're going to play Clue!" she laughed, clasping her hands together behind his head and staring into his eyes.

"Well that's good. I love your drawings" Max said, squeezing his granddaughter hard.

"Hi Dad!" Brennan called from the front door.

Max looked up to see a small person walking toddling him on short solid legs. He put Christine down and held out his arms "Come on tiger!" he called as Hank headed towards him, his chubby fingers opening and closing, his hands held out to Max.

Max hoisted Hank up onto his hip and kissed his forehead, looking over at Brennan who was smiling widely at him. He looked down into the face of this little boy who resembled Booth so much and grinned. "You're getting so big!" he said.

Hank grinned a gap toothed smile and grabbed at Max's nose squeezing it hard.

"Honk! Honk!" Max hooted and then laughed.

"Pop Pop" Hank giggled.

Max's eyes widened and he looked over at Brennan "Did you hear that? He called me Pop Pop!" he looked down at Hank "That's right, isn't it? I'm Pop Pop! Yes I am!"

Brennan watched as Booth opened the trunk and heaved two cases of beer out.

"You did get more than that, didn't you? And you ordered our fresh produce? And "

Booth walked past her "Yes, yes, of course, yes. It's all in the car. Little help?" he said, looking back at Max who was still fussing over his grand children.

Brennan walked up to Max and gave him a hug and kissed his cheek. "You look good Dad. The bus ride was OK?" she asked.

Max smiled and kissed his daughter back "Yeah. It was long and my knees and back hurt. But I'm OK. Unlike Grumpy" he said, nodding in the direction of Booth who had come back out of the house and walked to the back of the car.

"I better help him. His stress levels are worse than a cat that just realised they used their ninth life!" Max laughed.

Brennan took Hank from Max and followed him to the car. She was peering at the shopping bags as Booth came back to the car for the fourth trip.

"Did you remember to"

"Bones. I got everything on the list. Every. Single. Thing. What I need to do now is to unpack the car. And then I need to drink a very large glass of scotch, take off my shoes and eat something that's bad for me. Not necessarily in that order. But I will do all three of those things as soon as I'm done here. OK?" Booth said, grabbing three large brown paper bags full of groceries. He stepped up to her and leaned over the bags and kissed her on the lips "Then maybe after that, you and I can go to our room, and you can help me relax in the bath." he winked at her and headed towards the house.

Max stepped awkwardly out from behind her, making her turn. "Dad! You. Uh. You didn't?"

Max, closed his eyes and shook his head, "I am trying to pretend I didn't" he said, grabbing a couple of shopping bags out of the car. "I'm trying" he repeated then followed Booth into the house.

Brennan shrugged her shoulders and looked at Hank who was staring at her "Well at least you didn't understand that" she said kissing his face.

"Mommy? Are you and Daddy going to have a bubble bath? Can I have one too?" Christine's voice made her look down at her daughter.

"Oh. Um. Well, Mommy and Daddy" she began.

Booth suddenly stepped between them and scooped Christine up into his arms and pretended to chew on her tummy "You'll be in bed before Daddy has a bath tonight baby. Maybe tomorrow you and I can hop in the hot tub? That'll be fun. Maybe Poppy Max might like to hop in too. We'll see. How about right now, you go inside and you can help Mommy put away all the groceries. There's lots and lots because we're having lots and lots of guests for Christmas Day!" he said staring at Brennan "Lots and lots and lots of people" he added.

Brennan screwed up her nose. "Don't be dramatic Booth." She leaned in and kissed Christine's forehead. "We've got all our friends coming to spend Christmas with us. And it is going to be a wonderful day." she smiled. "Isn't it Booth?"

Booth sighed and put his daughter down, setting her on her feet "Mommy's right. It's going to be fun and loud and we're all going to eat too much"

"And we're going to open presents?" Christine asked, hopefully.

"Yes we are going to open presents. And it's going to be great. Mommy will make sure it's great." he said.

Just then, Bones' phone rang. "Oh no. Bones. Please. Don't answer it. I have a bad feeling." Booth said.

Brennan laughed "Oh Booth. You're being ridiculous now" she said as she pulled her phone from her pocket and answered it. "Temperance Brennan. Yes! How are you? You're back in town? That's wonderful."

Booth stood staring at his wife, shaking his head from side to side, his mouth forming the word no over and over.

Brennan held up a hand and frowned at him then turned her back on him.

"Oh Bones. This is gonna be bad. I just know it." he muttered, walking past her towards the house.

"Oh No! You can't do that! You must come here. No. I insist. No trouble at all. Yes. Absolutely I'm sure. Wonderful! See you then" she pushed her phone back into her pocket and walked back to the house, a large grin on her face.

"Great news everyone!" she announced, putting Hank down on the floor. "Daisy and little Seeley are coming for Christmas!"

Booth covered his face with his hand.

"She was going to have Christmas by herself, but I told her that it was not even an option" Brennan said.

Booth dropped his hand and stared at her "You're right. She shouldn't be on her own. We'll fit them in. What's one more at the table." he said.

Max cleared his throat and stared at Booth, who walked over to the bar and poured himself a glass of scotch, full to the brim.

"Booth!" Brennan exclaimed, seeing the glass.

"Uh, I got distracted and slipped. It's fine Bones" he said, looking at the glass, then leaned down and slurped at the liquid to bring the level down. "There. Now I can add ice" he said grinning at Brennan.

"Don't mind if I do" Max said holding out a glass.

Booth stared at him, then reluctantly, poured a single measure into the glass. "I'm leaving room for ice" he said grinning, as Max looked at the glass. "What?" he added.

Brennan smiled at him then looked at her father. "This is going to be the most wonderful Christmas ever! Now, Dad. You and Booth are going out Christmas Tree shopping tomorrow!"

"No, I'm going to chop down my own tree Bones. I told you that!" Booth said, frowning as he took another large swig of scotch.

"And I reminded you that we have so much to do, it would be better if you simply went to the Christmas Tree Farm and bought one already cut and prepped." Brennan reminded him. "We really don't have time for you to go tramping through the woods looking for a tree."

Booth stared at his drink. This Christmas had definitely taken a sharper turn than he anticipated.

"Well, I don't think it would take too long for us to find the perfect tree Tempe. And if Booth really wants to find and chop down his own. Well, I think he should." Max said.

Booth stared at Max, then looked at Brennan who was frowning. He could see her mind ticking over. She was trying to analyse why her father was on his side, and not hers. Her mouth opened, then closed. Then she said "Well, as long as you don't get distracted, or lost, or hurt, or"

"We'll be fine Tempe. It's not the first time I've done this." Max said.

"Maybe, but I can't remember the last time you did it." Brennan said, seriously.

Max stared at his daughter for a moment "Well, then. It's about time I did it again. For you. And for my grandchildren. We'll do it together." he said, reaching over and patting Booth on the shoulder. "It'll be the best Christmas tree you'll ever see." He looked up at the ceiling "I think we could easily fit a fifteen footer in here, right Booth?" he asked.

Brennan's eyes popped open "I think we agreed seven feet would be tall enough"

Max screwed up his nose "Rubbish. I'll measure up in the morning. It'll be fine pumpkin" he said walking over to Brennan and giving her a hug. "Now. I'm hungry. How about I grill us some burgers for dinner?"

"Yay! Burgers!" Christine yelled and danced around her brother who was sitting on the floor.

"Burber!" he yelled.

"Hank wants a burger too Poppy!" Christine laughed, squatting down next to her brother. "You want a burger Hank?" she asked him as he bounced up and down on his bottom.

Booth's bad mood seemed to dissipate at that exact moment. He looked at his wife. She was so happy about hosting this big, ridiculous crazy, Christmas Day even though she had originally insisted was only going to be him, her and the kids. Her eyes were sparkling, her smile was so bright. She looked so beautiful and so happy.

He looked at Max. He looked old, and tired. But there was a sparkle in his eye as he talked about chopping down a Christmas Tree for his daughter.

He looked at his daughter, who was so excited about having a big family Christmas for the first time in her life.

And then Hank, who really had no clue what was happening, but was just squealing and bouncing on the floor.

"Sounds perfect Max. Perfect. Cheers!" he held up his glass to Max who returned the gesture.

Brennan stood, her hands clasped in front of her chest. Things were turning out just the way she was hoping. Nothing could go wrong.


	4. We're Not Going To Get Lost

"Booth! Can you slow down?" Max called. He was puffing badly and having trouble keeping up with Booth who was tromping ahead of him.

"No Max. I can't. Can you hurry up? We're never going to find this tree at this rate." Booth grumbled back at his father in law.

"Hang on boy. You asked me to come along. I could have been home sitting in your leather recliner, drinking egg nog and playing with my grandchildren" Max countered, trying to catch up to Booth.

Booth stopped walking and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He exhaled and watched his steamy warm breath float away from him.

He turned around "You're right. I did ask you" he said, lying through his teeth. It was actually Bones' idea for them to go together. "See, Bones doesn't trust me to pick the right sized tree. We kind of had a Christmas tree incident last year" Booth said, looking down at the ground, the toe of his shoe digging into the grass.

"Christmas tree incident?" Max asked, smirking. "What exactly is a Christmas tree incident?"

Booth placed the head of the axe he was carrying onto the ground and leant on the handle with one hand. "Oh you know. I decided that I could guestimate the height of the tree that would fit in our living room. Only, I sort of appear to have a deficiency where special awareness is concerned." he said.

Max didn't speak. He just stood smirking at Booth.

"OK! I chopped down a fifteen foot tree" Booth said.

"Fifteen foot?" Max asked, his eyebrows raised.

"Fine! It was probably closer to twenty feet. But it really didn't look that big until I tied it to the car." Booth said, his face growing hot.

Max burst out laughing. His hand pressed against his stomach "Oh Booth, stop. You're killing me. Twenty feet? That's about double the height that you needed!" he laughed.

"I know. You don't need to rub it in. I got enough of that from Bones. I'm on track this year. I have a measuring tape with me" Booth said, pulling a metal, retractable tape measure from his coat pocket. "Ten feet. That's the absolute limit." he added. "Bones' orders"

Max nodded and walked past Booth "Well we better find one soon. We've already been walking for an hour and a half. What exactly are we looking for? The Holy Grail of Christmas Trees?" he said.

"Exactly! That's exactly what we're looking for. And that's why we're walking deeper into the forest. I want to find a tree that hasn't been even looked at by human eyes. No damage. Clean air, no exhaust fumes from vehicles driving past. No broken branches from people climbing or hanging from them. " Booth said excitedly.

"So we're looking for a virgin tree?" Max said, sarcastically.

Booth looked at Max, then shrugged "I guess we are!"

The walked on for another ten minutes, when Booth suddenly yelped and started running.

"Dammit Booth!" Max yelled, trying to follow him as quickly as he could.

He stepped between a row of trees and saw Booth, kneeling at the foot of a tree.

Booth turned around and grinned "This is it! This is our tree!" he said, then turned back and stared up at the richly coloured evergreen in front of him. "She's perfect"

"She?" Max muttered, shaking his head.

Max walked up behind Booth and looked up at the tree. "Are you sure this isn't too tall? Looks kinda big if you ask me" he said, frowning.

"It'll be fine. I just have a gut feeling. And you know me and my gut. It's perfect" Booth said, determinedly getting to his feet and shouldering the axe.

"Stand back Max" Booth said, planting his feet. He raised the axe and took a deep breath. He swung the axe and connected with the tree trunk.

"I think it's too big Booth" Max said.

Booth pulled the axe from the wood and raised it over his shoulder again. "It's not. It's perfect." He grunted as he swung the axe again, the steel slicing into the timber.

"Did you measure it?" Max asked.

"Nope." Booth grunted as he swung the axe again. "I can tell. It's perfect."

"But you brought the tape measure so you didn't have another tree incident." Max said quickly.

Booth hesitated mid swing and turned and frowned at Max "Max. I'm not an idiot. There will be no repeat of the tree incident. Now step back before you get hurt old man." he said, swinging the axe which bit deeply into the wood. He repeated this action over and over, until he had to just lean on the handle of the axe, which was embedded deep into the timber. He was sweating, puffing and generally starting to think he was never going to get this done. He swallowed hard, trying to ignore Max's chuckling.

Booth heaved, and wrenched the axe from the trunk. "One more ought to do it" he grunted as he swung the axe one more time.

There was a crack as he pulled the axe head from the tree. "There she goes!" he yelled excitedly, and set his foot against the trunk of the tree and leaned into it. The tree resisted for a moment, then smoothly tipped away from him, landing on the ground with a dull thud.

Booth dropped the axe and rubbed his hands together "All we have to do is get it back to the car and we'll be on our way in no time!" he said eagerly.

Max turned and looked around. "OK. Uh, which way is the car?" he asked.

Booth scoffed and pointed "That way of course". Then he pursed his lips and scrunched up his nose, "No, that way" he pointed in another direction. "Yep, that's the way" he added, not so certain.

Max stood nodding, his mouth downturned. "My son in law, the genius" he said. "You didn't think to take note of where the car was?"

Booth frowned "Yes. No. I don't know. Look, it's roughly in that direction" he pointed past Max again. "Let's just get the tree and start off in that direction."

Max stared at Booth, his mouth tightly pursed and twisted to one side "Rope?" he asked and pointed at the tree "To tie around the branches so we can carry it?"

Booth felt his face blanch "I have rope" he said, his voice cracking. "In the back of the car"

"Excellent" Max said looking up at the sky. "And it's starting to get dark. Wonderful" he added.

Booth stood, his hands on his hips, fingers splayed and hooked into his belt. He thought for a moment "OK. We grab the bottom branches and haul the tree between us. It should be OK. We head in that direction, I'll press the remote on the car every so often. When we're in range we'll hear it beep. If we don't find the car within twenty minutes. Or so. I'll make a call"

Max shoved his hands into the pockets of his coat and pulled out a pair of gloves. "Good thing I brought these with me then" he said, handing one to Booth. "Come on. The quicker we start, the quicker we hopefully find the car. I have to say, I don't want to be sleeping out in the forest" he said. "Not even for the perfect tree"

"Fair enough" Booth said, pulling on the glove.

* * *

"No. I don't know where they are! They were going to buy a Christmas Tree. I called the farm. They don't recall seeing them. Oh no. No. Angela. I tried calling. It kept going to his messages. They wouldn't have?" Brennan said suddenly, her voice trailing off. She held the phone tightly, her knuckles growing white.

 _"Sweetie. I'm sure they're fine. He's a smart, capable man. And your Dad. Well. They'll be fine."_ Angela tried to sound convincing.

"I know where they've gone." Brennan said suddenly. "Booth had it in his head to go and chop down the perfect tree. I told him to just go and buy one from the Christmas Tree Farm. I thought I had convinced him. Angela, what if they're out there, in the forest somewhere. What if something has happened. What if"

 _"Brennan. Stop it right now. Nothing has happened. Look. Give me twenty minutes. I'm coming over."_ Angela said. Brennan nodded pressing the phone to her ear.

She could hear Angela calling out to Jack _Honey, I have to go to Brennan's. She thinks Booth and Max have gone off on a wild tree chopping expedition and are lost_

 _Aww Damn! They went out tree chopping and didn't invite me? Why wouldn't they invite me?_

 _Jack, not everything has to include you Sweetie._

 _"OK, you still there Bren? I'll be right over. Don't leave to go running off to look for them. Just stay put until I get there. Then we'll decide what we're doing."_ Angela said, then hung up the phone.

Brennan stood, dropping her hand to her side, the phone clasped tightly. She looked down at the phone and lifted it up and dialled Booth's number again.

 _The person you are calling isn't available right now_

She hung up the phone and set it down on the dining table, frowning. She wasn't sure if she was worried or angry, so settled on being a combination of both.

"Dammit Booth, where are you and Max?" Brennan said out loud, unconsciously stamping her foot.

* * *

"Booth! Wait. I need to stop for a minute" Max huffed.

Booth stopped walking and dropped the tree, leaning back, pressing his hands into the small of his back.

Max stood bent over, his hands gripping his knees. "I don't know how much further I can go Booth. Can you try the phone again?" he asked, breathing heavily.

Booth shook his head. "We're still out of range" he said, his phone held up in front of his face. He held it higher, waving his arm left then right, up and down. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and pressed the button.

"Wait!" he said excitedly, pressing the button again. "Did you hear that?"

"Hear what? All I can hear is the wind blowing through these damned trees! And the sound of my own heart about to burst through the walls of my chest!" Max yelled at him.

"Shut up Max. Listen" Booth pressed the button again. "See? Hear it?"

Max shook his head and frowned at him. "You're delusional Booth. We're lost in the woods and you're starting to hear things. Do we even have any water? " he growled.

"No. Shut up and actually listen" Booth said pressing the remote again.

Beep beep faintly on the breeze

"See?" Booth said excitedly.

Max scrunched his nose up, furrowing his brow low over his eyes "Do that again" he said.

Beep beep "you hear that?" Booth asked.

"I think I did! From that direction!" Max said. "Let's leave the tree and just go find the car"

"What? No! I didn't go all that way to find the perfect tree, and then haul this thing for miles, just to dump it half a mile from the car!" Booth said, frustrated.

"OK, OK! Don't get your panties in a twist" Max said, thinking. "So we leave the tree, find the car, then come back and get the tree in the morning"

"No. We're taking it with us." Booth said firmly, then held up his hand "And that's final. Come on." He added pulling on his single glove and grabbed the bottom branch, waiting for Max.

Max stared at him for a minute, then pulled on his glove, muttering intelligibly under his breath, and grabbed the branch. "How did I let you talk me into this" was the only thing Booth understood.

* * *

"Jack! I wasn't expecting you to come over too!" Brennan said, opening the door to see Angela, Jack and Michael Vincent standing there.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'm going to go look for them. You girls stay here with the kids, and keep the phone by you." Hodgins said.

"Jack said he and Booth once talked about where the best trees were" Angela said confidently.

"Really? So you think that's where they might be?" Brennan asked, hopeful that he might be right. "I hope you're right. I told him not to get lost, but he just laughed and said _We're not going to get lost._ I bet they're lost.

"Look. I might be wrong. But my gut is telling me to start looking there first. And it's getting late. I need to leave now." Jack said heading for the door. He stopped to drop a kiss on Angela's cheek and whisper in her ear "Just stay by the phone and keep her calm. And maybe, have something hot to eat ready for when we get back. If they've been stranded out there, they'll be cold and hungry"

"Jack?" Brennan said softly.

"Doctor B. They'll be fine. We'll be back before you know it" he said pulling the door closed behind him.

 _Boy, I hope I'm right_ he thought to himself, his cheeks puffing out as he blew out a deep breath as he walked towards his car.

* * *

beep beep

"It's getting louder!" Booth cried, pulling the tree along quicker.

"Slow down Booth. Are you trying to kill me?" Max yelled at him. "We'd do this a lot faster if we weren't dragging this goddamned log with us!"

"This isn't a log and you know it. Just keep moving!" Booth yelled back.

"Like I said, if you hadn't just marched aimlessly into the woods" Max countered

"And like I said, KEEP MOVING!" Booth growled back.

* * *

Jack pulled onto a side dirt road and drove towards the tree line. He turned a bend and smiled. Booth's car was parked there. He pulled in beside it and got out of his car. All of a sudden, the lights on the car flashed and the security locking beeped.

 _What do you know? Booth's using his remote to locate the car!_ He thought, then frowned. "Shit! That means they were lost!" he added out loud.

Hodgins looked around and noticed footprints in the dirt and began to follow them.

"Booth! Max!" he yelled out.

He pulled a can of silly string out of his pocket and sprayed some bright pink string onto the branch of a tree, before continuing on.

"There's no way I'm getting lost too" he said out loud, then called out again "Booth! Can you hear me?"

* * *

Booth was perspiring heavily as he hauled the tree along. By now, Max was literally being pulled along with the tree.

"Booth. I can't keep going" Max said, his voice weak.

"Come on Max" Booth stopped and dropped the tree, worrying now that he was looking at Max. His face was pale and his skin looked clammy. "I'm sure it's not far now." He pressed the remote again.

beep beep

"See? Hear that? We're so close now. It can't be that far. It's getting louder. So we're going in the right direction. Tell you what. I'll drag the tree. You just walk alongside. You can manage that?" Booth asked Max, hoping that the answer was going to be yes.

 _God, Bones is gonna kill me!_ he suddenly thought about how his wife was going to react to him almost losing her father in the woods, and not coming home with the perfect tree.

Faintly in the distance, Booth suddenly heard someone calling his name.

"Come on Max! We're definitely almost there!" he said, clapping Max on the shoulder, making the old man groan.

"Hi! Hello! Yes! We're here! Over here!" he bellowed.


	5. Size Matters

"and then I realised that Booth was using his remote to locate the position of the car."

Booth huffed and held up his hand in front of Hodgins "I knew where I was going. I just was making sure we were not too far away from the car" he said, as confidently as he could.

"Of course, I found him before he found the car" Hodgins continued to relate his version of the story merrily.

"No. We walked into you!" Booth countered.

Hodgins shook his head "No. Nope. Definitely not. You were walking in a south westerly direction which was taking you past where the car was. I definitely found you." he said confidently.

"And I told you we were just fine. We would have been at the car park in less than five minutes" Booth's voice began to raise in volume.

"Oh shut up you two. Booth, we were lost for a while. Jack, we would have gotten there eventually. But had we just left the tree behind we would have been at the car a half an hour before you found"

Booth's head flicked around and glared at Max, who stuttered "before we came across you. Right before we walked into the carpark." he finished nervously.

"There was no way I was leaving that tree behind. It's perfect!" Booth said, frowning.

"Oh poppycock Booth. We could have left it there, located the car and then come back for it tomorrow. But no" Max used his whiney voice to imitate Booth "someone might steal my tree"

Booth crossed his arms over his chest and stuck his chin out. "Damn straight! Anyone could have gone early and found it, already chopped down. I didn't do all that work for someone else!" he said.

"and you would never have gotten that thing up onto your car if I wasn't there" Hodgins interjected.

Booth and Max glared at Hodgins "Shut up Jack!" they both said.

Hodgins pulled a face and turned to Brennan "They wouldn't have" he said under his breath.

"Well Sweetie, I'm just glad you all arrived back safe and sound" Angela said, trying to diffuse the tension between the three men. "So Booth. Let's see this perfect tree!" she said, using air quotes when she said the word perfect.

Brennan sniggered, making Booth flash her a look "What?" he said.

Brennan covered her mouth and feigned a cough "What? Something caught in my throat" she coughed again, shaking her head.

"You wait and see. You'll all eat your words" Booth said walking towards the door. "Come on Christine! Come and see the Christmas tree Daddy got for you! He chopped it down with his bare hands!" he called.

Christine skipped up to her father and looked up at him with wonder "How did you chop it with your hands?" she asked frowning.

"What? No. No, Christine, I chopped it down using my. I had an axe. I chopped it. Oh never mind, let's go get it off the car." Booth said, flustered.

"Need a hand?" Hodgins asked.

"No." Booth said firmly. "Well, maybe. I'll call you if I need help" and walked through the door, his daughter close at his heels.

Max smirked and looked at his imaginary watch "He'll be calling in 5… 4… 3… "

"Dad. Stop it. You know how excited Booth has been about this tree thing. Don't start anything with him. And if"

"when" Max said.

"IF, he calls out for help. We'll all go and help him. But I'm sure he won't need us. He promised he would chop down a nice, manageable seven or eight foot tree"

Max stifled a laugh and shook his head "manageable. Right. Who's for a drink? Jack? Ang? Tempe? Is there any of my egg nog left, or shall I make a fresh batch?" he asked, heading for the kitchen.

"I'd like to try it" Jack said, following him "Of course nothing compares to my world famous egg nog"

Max stopped walking and turned around, the palm of his hand held up in Hodgins' face "Nobody. Repeat. Nobody makes a better egg nog than I do Jack. No. Body." he said firmly.

"Well I have to disagree there Max. Honey? Tell Max how good my egg nog is!" Hodgins turned and called out to Angela.

"Tempe. Tell this nincompoop that nobody makes better egg nog than your old man" Max called out.

Angela stepped in between the two men. "Now, now honey" she addressed Hodgins. "I'm sure you both make spectacularly good egg nog, but we're guests, so we'd love to try yours Max!" she turned and smiled at Max, who wiggled his head from side to side and grinned

"You will never want to drink another eggnog after you try it" Max said, holding up his index finger "Creamy, sweet, and full of holiday cheer, with cinnamon, nutmeg, and vanilla beans. And of course a good slosh of bourbon. And then" Max hesitated and squinted directly at Hodgins "and then I add my secret ingredient. Which of course takes it from ordinary eggnog to the most spectacular eggnog you'll ever try" he said. "You" he pointed at Hodgins "stay in here". Then he smiled at Angela, "you understand honey. Gotta keep the secret ingredient a secret!" he touched his nose with his finger.

"Of course Max. You go ahead. I can't wait to taste it." Angela said, turning and pushing Hodgins away from the kitchen.

"It can't be that good" Jack said.

"You just wait boy!" Max yelled from the kitchen "It'll knock your squinty socks off!"

Hodgins walked back into the living room and sat down, looking smug "It won't be that good. You can't just make it, like that!" and snapped his fingers.

Brennan sat opposite him "Oh no. He has batches of his mixture ready in jugs in the refrigerator, just waiting for him to add his secret ingredient. They're all at different stages of manufacture. I just know I'm not allowed to touch any of the jugs with numbers on them" she laughed.

Angela sat next to Brennan and leaned into her shoulder "So, um. What exactly is his secret ingredient?" she whispered.

Brennan shrugged "I actually don't know. I'm never allowed in the kitchen when he's preparing it" she said. "Honestly" she added when Hodgins snorted.

The front door opened suddenly "Daddy is in a bit of a pickle and he may or may not need some help" Christine said.

"Told ya!" Hodgins jumped up out of his seat and headed for the door.

"Jack. Do not poke the bear" Angela said firmly.

Hodgins nodded "I know. I'll be nice. Until we get the tree down, then? Well who knows what might happen" he laughed.

"A pickle?" Angela turned and laughed at Brennan, who shrugged.

Fifteen minutes later, the door opened again and Christine came in "Where do you want the tree mommy? She asked.

Brennan frowned "Where it always goes. Why are you asking" she said, then her face blanched. "Oh no. Not again. BOOTH!"

* * *

Brennan ran out the front to be confronted by Jack holding the trunk, and her husband, buried in the branches of a magnificent fir, which by her estimation was several feet taller than the seven foot tree they agreed upon.

"Booth! You promised you wouldn't do this again. That tree isn't going to fit!" she cried.

"Of course it will fit. It just looks taller because it's lying down. It'll be perfect" he said confidently.

"I'm not so sure Booth" Hodgins said "this thing has to be"

"Just carry the tree Jack" Booth said. "Honestly Bones. It's going to look amazing" he said, heading towards the door.

"It looks too wide for the doorway" Brennan said, frowning.

"The branches will just bend a little as Jack pulls it through. Don't worry" Booth said as he directed Hodgins to line up with the door. "Ok Hodgins. You go. I'll just support the mid section and Max" he stopped and looked around "we need Max"

Brennan turned to go inside to get Max, but couldn't fit past the tree, so she had to call out to her father from outside the front door "Dad! Can you come around the front? Booth needs your help to get the tree inside!"

Max's head appeared around the corner from the kitchen. "What? I'm right in the middle of adding the. Oh fine. Just wait a minute" he grumbled.

Booth was supporting the tree, his face was going red.

"Booth I'm going to have to put this down. This thing weighs a tonne!" Hodgins said letting go of the trunk.

"NO!" Booth felt the weight of the tree pull and he had to let go. He heard the cracking of wood "Dammit, I think a branch just broke!"

Brennan sighed "Its fine. We'll just put it at the back. IF the tree even fits. I still think it's way too big. How tall is it?" she asked, convinced that it was at least twelve or thirteen feet.

"It's fine. It will come close, but it's going to fit" Booth insisted.

Max came round the corner of the house "Now what?" he grumbled.

"I need you to support the tip so it doesn't break" Booth said.

"Aren't you going to cut it to the right height before you take it inside?" Max said.

"It'll only need a little trimmed off, if any. Look at it. It's great!" Booth said. "Come on, Jack. Let's go."

Hodgins shook his head and heaved the trunk of the tree up off the ground. "this is never going to work" he muttered.

"OK. All together. Heave!" Booth yelled as he pushed the tree forcing it into the doorway. "Heave!" he yelled again.

"Booth! This isn't working!" Hodgins called out from the doorway. The bottom branches were jammed inside the door frame.

"Just pull. Now we have the bottom through, the rest will just follow!" Booth insisted.

"It's too big" both Brennan and Max said together.

"What is with you people?" Booth said, looking at them both. "Look at it. It's going to"

He suddenly saw the tree for what it was. A fourteen foot fir tree, with an eight inch trunk.

"Oh shit"

"Daddy! You said a bad word!" Christine piped up having been fascinated,watching her father, grandfather and uncle Jack trying to push a gigantic Christmas tree through the front door.

"Told ya" Max muttered under his breath, letting the top of the tree go. "I'm going to go finish my eggnog while you ninny's work out how to get the tree back out of the doorway" he said, knowing full well that the bottom branches were inside the house and that tree wasn't going anywhere.

Booth stood amongst the branches of the tree staring at it properly for the first time. He felt his throat close up.

"Hoo Wee! What have we got here!"

Booth covered his face with his hand "Great. Just what I need right now"

James Aubrey sauntered up the pathway, a gigantic toothy grin across his face. "Uh, Mrs B. Did you know you have a forest stuck in your front door?" he laughed, tears threatening to fall from the corners of his eyes.

"Thank you James. I'm aware of the situation." Brennan said, shaking her head at Booth, who tried not to look her in the eye.

Finally he uncovered his face "Fine. Fine! I'm sorry. I got a little carried away looking for the perfect tree. And apart from the size, it is perfect." Booth said. He pointed at Aubrey "Why are you even here? Why is he here?" Booth asked Brennan.

"I invited Aubrey to join us for the tree decorating and eggnog. Christine wanted him to come."

Booth rolled his eyes "Great. Aubrey, don't say a word. Go around the back to the shed and find the chainsaw and bring it back here."

Aubrey stood rocking backwards and forwards on his heels staring at Booth.

"Please" Booth said, reluctantly.

"Of course! I'd love to be of assistance!" Aubrey laughed as he headed around the house.

Booth stepped away from the tree and walked to the car. He retrieved a tape measure from the floor of the car and handed the end to Brennan. "Can you please stand by the door?" he asked sheepishly.

He pulled the tape until he extended it to it's maximum. Which was ten feet. He turned to see the tip of the tree approximately four feet away.

Booth sighed heavily and rolled his eyes, not wanting to look at Brennan.

Hodgins came around the side of the house with Aubrey who was carrying the chainsaw.

"So how tall is this baby. Exactly?" Hodgins asked.

"fifteen feet" Booth mumbled softly.

"Sorry. I didn't catch that" Hodgins asked, grinning widely at Brennan.

"It's about fifteen feet. Give or take." Booth said.

"Booth! That's double what we agreed upon. How on earth did you even tie it to the car?" she asked, shocked.

"Oh it wasn't easy. Or legal" Hodgins laughed out loud.

"Outta my way" Booth grunted, grabbing the chainsaw from Aubrey. He walked up to the house and picked a spot about two feet away from the door, fired up the saw and sighed. The saw bit into the wood and he cut through the trunk in ten seconds flat. "I wish I had this with me today" he mumbled under his breath.

"You need to cut it about here" Brennan was standing half way along the length of the tree.

"But that's so small!" Booth whined.

"No. It's eight feet. Which still leaves room for the Christmas star not to scratch the ceiling." Brennan said. "Eight feet Booth" she repeated.

Booth dragged his feet to where Brennan was standing and placed the blade two feet away from the point she was holding the tape measure to.

"No Booth. Here" she tapped the trunk with the tape measure.

Booth huffed loudly. He moved to the spot she had pointed to and looked at her, then started the chainsaw and cut through the trunk. He then trimmed the branches from the trunk so they had a good foot and a half of clean trunk.

"Perfect!" Brennan said, linking arms with Angela who had been standing laughing at the proceedings the whole time.

"Daddy? How are you going to get the tree out of the door?" Christine asked.

Booth stared at the thick trunk, heavy branches jammed either side of the doorway.

"Booth! The paint is all scratched!" Brennan said taking a closer look at the damage done by the tree.

"Never fear Mrs B. I'm a dab hand with a paint brush. I can fix that for you in no time." Aubrey offered.

Brennan smiled "Thank you James. I appreciate it. But I think Booth needs to fix his mess himself."

"Okey dokie. But if you change your mind?" Aubrey said.

Booth walked towards the doorway and began cutting the tree into small pieces. He cleared the tree from the doorway, leaving a mess of pine needles, sawdust and twigs both inside and outside.

"I'm not cleaning that up" Brennan said, her hands pressed against her hips.

Max appeared at the door with Hank in his arms. "All that noise, poor little Hank woke up!" he said bouncing the toddler on his hip.

Brennan looked at Hank, eyes red, face red, nose running from crying. "Oh dear. Come on baby. Let's clean you up" she said as she took Hank from Max and stepped over all the mess Booth had made. "Now he's going to be all cranky because you woke him up." Brennan said to Booth.

"Someone's in trou-ble" Aubrey sang, making Booth growl.

"What a waste" Booth said, staring at all the timber lying in the front yard.

"Tried to tell you" Max started.

"Don't Max. Just don't. I admit it. OK? I was"

"Wrong?" Max said quickly.

"I was overly focussed on finding the perfect tree and apparently, I forgot that size matters" Booth said.

Hodgins was laughing as he cleared some of the larger branches and threw them into the front yard to clear the doorway. "Let's get this thing inside and then I want to try that secret recipe eggnog" he said.

Booth's head popped up "The one with the whipped eggwhites stirred in at the end?" he said.

"Booth!" Max yelled.

Hodgins laughed "AhHa!"


	6. Accidents Happen

Brennan smiled as Max lifted Christine high as he could to place a bauble on the tree. Booth was standing on a ladder, trying to find the globe on the lights that wasn't working.

"See? This is why I wanted to buy new LED lights Booth." Brennan said, her hands planted firmly on her hips.

"Or at the very least you should have check that the lights were working before you put them on the tree. You know you'll never find it that way." Max said as he set Christine down on her feet.

"Pop Pop Pop Pop Tee!" young Hank called out to his grandfather who turned and grinned at the toddler who was holding up a Flyers bauble.

"Really?" Max said, taking the bauble from Hank and holding it up in the air.

"What? That's a great decoration." Booth said, frowning.

"It's not exactly Christmassy though is it?" Max asked placing the decoration towards the back of the tree, reluctant to place it at all.

"Of course it is! It's bright. It's shiny. It's got that gold, glittery stuff on it. Hey! Why are you putting it back there?" Booth said, noticing what Max was doing.

"I'm making room for the special decorations I brought with me. I thought it was about time I contributed to your tree Tempe." Max said, holding up a finger. "I'll be right back"

Brennan rescued a string of red beads from Hanks hands "No No Hank. Gentle. These will break if you pull them like"

Just as she said that, Hank squealed and pulled the strand tight between his fists. Tiny, red, shiny beads flew into the air and skittered across the floor.

"Oh Hank! No! Look at that!" Brennan cried.

Max walked into the room holding four small boxes.

"Dad! Watch out" Brennan screamed as Max's foot stepped onto several of the red beads, his eyes popping open as he felt his foot begin to slide.

Booth saw what was happening and yelled "Watch out!" as he jumped from the ladder and landed heavily behind Max, grabbing at him as the older man tumbled to the floor.

Max landed squarely on Booth's chest, forcing the air out of his son in law's lungs with a loud "oof!"

"Oh God. Bones. My back" Booth said, his voice quavering.

"Dad, are you alright?" Brennan asked, taking the boxes from Max. He had managed to hold onto them as he fell.

"Of course he's alright! He used me as a mattress!" Booth growled loudly, then groaned as Max tried to sit up on Booths stomach. "For God's sake man, get off me!" he yelled.

"Oh Booth, stop it" Brennan said, grabbing her father's hands and helping him stand up. "You've scared Hank!" she added, turning and attending to her young son who had burst into tears when Booth had yelled at Max.

Max stood and pressed his hands into his thighs and blew out a deep breath "Phew! That was a close call! I could have broken a hip or something!" he said.

Brennan picked up Hank and bounced him on her hip, shushing his loud crying "Are you sure you're OK Dad? " she asked Max.

"Yeah, thanks. I'm just fine. No problem at all. I may have fractured my lower back, but I'm just going to lie here while you take care of your father WHO ISN'T HURT!" Booth boomed.

Brennan's attention snapped back to Booth. She was going to tell him off again, but suddenly realised that he hadn't moved. She immediately became concerned. "Oh Booth. I'm sorry. Can I help you up?" she said putting Hank down and holding her hands out to grab his hands. She started to pull, making him yelp.

"Oww! No! Bones. Wait. Just. Just give me a minute." Booth whimpered.

"Where does it hurt?" she asked.

"Where doesn't it hurt would probably be a more pertinent question Bones. I just want to lie here for another minute and then." Booth frowned, not really sure that he could get up.

"I'm going to call someone" Brennan said suddenly, turning to grab the phone.

"NO! Don't call anyone. I'll be fine. I just need to slowly roll" Booth tried to roll and was quickly forced back by a searing pain in his hip and lower back.

"Booth, I'm sorry. You should have just let me fall" Max said, concerned that Booth really was hurt badly.

"Don't be stupid Max. You didn't make me jump. Uh. Can you go grab me a couple of pain killers out of the medicine cabinet? The ones in the yellow box with the blue writing. I'll take them, then when they've kicked in. I'll try to get up." Booth said.

"No. Booth. No. I really think I need to call an ambulance. You can't take any medication until we know what damage you've done." Brennan said, her medical persona kicking in.

"No ambulance Bones. Don't be stupid" he argued.

"Don't call me stupid. What if you've really hurt your back?" she said back, her voice lowered as Christine came over to her father.

"Daddy are you going to be a paropegink?" she asked.

"A paraplegic? No baby. I've just hurt my back a little bit. I'm going to be fine." Booth said, hoping that he was telling her the truth.

"Oh" Christine said, disappointment tinging her voice.

"Why did you ask that Christine?" Brennan asked her daughter, confused by her reaction.

"Well. It would be fun for me to sit on Daddy's lap and he wheel me around. Teddy Markson's daddy is a paropegink"

"para-plegic" Brennan corrected her.

"Oh for God's sake Bones. Don't encourage her!" Booth said, flopping his head back onto the floor.

"Paro pegic" Christine said carefully. "And he brings her to school. He's got a motor on it and everything and he lets her steer" Christine finished.

"Christine. Seriously, Daddy is fine. I'm just resting for a minute and then I'm going to get up" Booth said, assuring his daughter that he was alright.

"Booth"

"No Bones. Honestly. I'll just take the painkillers" he nodded at Max, holding out a hand for the tablets and a glass of water "And in fifteen minutes, you and Max can help me up."

"You know Booth, my pal Archie took a tumble and he was sure he was alright. Turns out he had fractured his hip and ended up in hospital two days later. Poor bastard." Max said, shaking his head.

"Why poor bastard?" Booth asked.

"Well he died, didn't he? Got an infection in his hip and poof!" Max snapped his fingers "That was it!"

"Is Daddy going to die?" Christine wailed.

"See what you've done?" Booth said. "No. No baby. I'm not going to die. My hip isn't broken. I just banged my back." he said confidently.

"Dad! Why would you tell a story like that?" Brennan said, holding Christine's face against her stomach. "why?" she added, mouthing the word.

Max pulled a face and shrugged. "Sorry. It just reminded me of Archie"

"No more talk about Archie!" Booth yelled. "In fact. No more talking. Just come over here and help me roll over."

Brennan let go of Christine, indicating for her to go sit on a chair and she and Max kneeled down next to Booth.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked.

"Of course." Booth said.

They slowly rolled him onto his side, then onto his stomach.

"This reminds me of the time we helped some beached whales" Max started to say.

"Dad. No more stories. Please" Brennan stopped him before he told the story about the pod of whales that beached themselves and died.

Booth pulled his arms in tight to his body, placing his hands by his chest "OK. I'm going to push myself back into a kneeling position" he said.

Brennan kneeled to the side of him. She grabbed him just above his hips to help support him as he moved.

"OK. One. Two. Three!" Booth counted off and slowly pushed himself up.

He got into the kneeling position with little help from Brennan, and turned to smile at her. He noticed her eyes were bright with unfallen tears "Bones. I'm really OK. I'm just going to be sore for a few days. Right, I'm going to crawl over to that chair and pull myself up into it."

Brennan nodded and swallowed the lump in her throat.

Slowly Booth crawled towards the chair. He grabbed at the arms and managed to use the chair to get himself up onto his feet. "There. OK. So. Now I'm going to sit down for a bit" he cringed as he sunk into the leather chair. "Oh Boy. Yeah. That's not too bad" he muttered as he settled himself.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright?" Brennan asked, worried.

"Bones. Look. If I wake up in the morning and cannot get out of bed. Well, then you have my permission to call an ambulance." He said.

Brennan pursed her lips. "when you wake up, you are going to the doctors to have your back checked out. I'm not having you take any chances this close to Christmas."

"Bones" Booth argued.

"Tempe's right Booth. It's two days until Christmas. You need to just have a check up. That was a pretty heavy fall. And thank you. I probably would have broken something had you not saved me." Max held out a hand.

Booth stared at his father in law for a moment, then grasped Max's hand and shook it.

"No problem Max. Accidents happen. Let's just not have any more while you're here." he said.

"Poppy if you break a hip can you take me for rides in your wheelchair?" Christine asked.

Booth and Max looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Sure baby. If I ever end up in a wheelchair, I'll definitely take you for a ride" Max said, tears falling from his eyes as he laughed.

"And you will live here so you could take me to school every day?" Christine asked.

Booth's mouth dropped open "No wheelchairs! Nobody is ending up in wheelchairs Christine." he said.

"Are you saying you don't want me to live here?" Max asked, feigning shock.

"No" Booth said, watching Christine's face "No, I'm not saying that. I'm saying. Uh"

"He's saying that you won't ever need a wheel chair because you're a very fit man. And. If the day ever came when you. Needed. To. Come." Brennan's voice faultered as she watched Booth's head shaking from side to side "I'm sure you'll be happier living in where you are for now" she finished, as Booth's head began nodding.

Christine's mouth down turned "Well that's sad. I'd like you to live here Poppy" she said.

Max smiled and held out his arms for a hug "Thank you sweetie" he said, grinning at Booth "I'll just have to come for more visits instead". He stood up and picked up the boxes he had carried in.

"Now, how about you open these up?" he handed one to Christine "Be very very gentle" he added.

Christine carefully opened the white box and pulled out a delicate pink ornament with silver beading and a pretty pink ribbon. "Look Mommy! It says Christine!" she said showing her mother.

"Oh Dad! It's beautiful!" Brennan said, taking the ornament from Christine to look at it more closely.

"And there's one here for Hank and you, and even for grumpy over there" Max said, handing the other boxes to Brennan, who opened them up and hung the four ornaments on the tree with care.

"They're perfect" she said, tears welling up in her eyes "So perfect Dad" she hugged her father and then looked at Booth. "Aren't they beautiful?" she asked.

"I can't really see them. But I'm sure they are. Thanks Max" Booth said.

"Well, I just wanted something on the tree from me" Max said nodding.

"So how about some eggnog?" he asked, rubbing his hands together.

Brennan smiled and nodded walking over to sit on the arm of the armchair Booth was sitting in.

"Can I get you a glass of something? Water? Soda?" she asked.

Booth frowned "What? No I want some eggnog!" he said.

"You just took pain killers. You can't have alcohol" Brennan said firmly. "I'll get you a soda" she added grinning at him.

"Great. Thanks." Booth said, sulking.

He watched them all walk to the kitchen and leaned his head back on the leather. "Just great."


	7. Have Yourself a Big Loud Christmas

The doorbell rang. "I'll get it" Booth called out to Brennan, who was prepping things for Christmas lunch the following day.

"Merry Christmas Eve!" Russ greeted Booth, his arms full of Christmas wrapped parcels.

Booth held out his hands and lifted two parcels out of Russ's hands. "Seasons Greetings! Welcome. How was the drive? Amy. Girls" he greeted Russ's wife and daughters with a kiss on the cheek. "Bones! Russ is here!" he turned and yelled.

Brennan came running out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on her apron. "Russ! Amy! So glad you could come! I was so excited when Dad told me. Come in!" she said, hugging her brother tightly after he deposited his packages on the sofa.

Amy stood looking at the Christmas tree in awe "Your tree is just amazing! And it's so big! We've never had one this tall have we Russ?" she said.

"Oh don't even mention that to Booth. Believe it or not, it was originally double that height. I'm sure Dad will tell you the story sometime today" Brennan laughed then walked over to Russ and linked arms with him.

"I can't believe this is our first Christmas together since we were kids!" Brennan said, tears welling up in her eyes.

"Come on Sis. Don't forget that Christmas when Dad was" Russ turned around and looked at his niece who was being fussed over by his daughters. "When Dad was you know. Inside."

Brennan frowned and shook her head "That doesn't count. I mean like this. A proper family Christmas" she said.

Russ laughed " It was bound to happen eventually. I'm glad Dad called and suggested it. You sure we're not going to crowd you though? We could always stay at that motel down the road."

"Well, that might work" Booth began to say.

"No!" Brennan turned and slapped Booth's arm "No! We've got plenty of room. The girls can bunk in with Christine. I've got a couple of fold out beds for them. And I got one of those big camping blow up mattresses for you and Amy. We'll set that up in the study. It's a little tight, but you'll manage. And you're only going to be sleeping in there, so it shouldn't matter." She said.

"You bought a mattress?" Booth mumbled as he rubbed his arm.

Brennan barely glanced at him "Yes. At the camping store. It was a bargain at only seven hundred dollars!"

Booth's jaw dropped "Wha? You spent Seven Hun"

"Booth stop standing there. Put those down and help bring in their luggage! Honestly." Brennan said, turning her back on him.

"And Dad is bunking in with Hank. So it's all good. It's going to be so much fun!" Brennan said happily.

"Fun" Booth repeated quietly, the forced himself to smile "So! We're about to hit the eggnog early. Can I get you one?"

"Is that Dad's recipe?" Russ asked.

"It sure is!" Max nodded.

Russ grinned "Then make mine a double. It was a long drive" he said.

"After you bring in the luggage!" Brennan yelled from the hallway.

Brennan guided Amy and the girls up to the rooms they'd be sleeping in and left the boys to chat and get drinks.

* * *

"Daddy! Mommy! He's been!" Christine's muffled scream ripped through Booth's brain, waking him up from the best night's sleep he'd had in the last few nights. Max's egg nog always did the trick.

Suddenly their door slammed open.

"He's BEEN!" Christine screamed, her voice so high pitched, Booth swore he felt his eardrum pop. She departed as quickly as she came, slamming their door closed behind her.

Brennan rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. "And so it begins. Really Booth. How many more years must we foster this fantasy of a jolly man dressed in red who brings Christmas gifts in the dead of night?" she muttered.

"Aww come on Bones. You know you love it. You're just cranky because you were up late putting her bike together. I'm sorry I couldn't help, but you know. My back and crouching on the floor just don't go together at the moment." Booth said, poking her in the upper arm repeatedly.

"I'm not even sure I trust her to ride it. What if I missed something? What if I didn't tighten the bolt things tight enough?" she said turning her worried eyes towards him.

"It's fine. I checked the tightness of all the important bolts when you went to the bathroom" Booth said. "She's going to"

"He's been! Come on you two!" Their door slammed open again and Max stuck his head in. "I let Hank out of his crib, but he's in need of. Well, he's done. You really need to clean him up Tempe" he added shaking his head, then grinned "Come on! Time to see what's under the tree!"

Brennan covered her eyes with her forearm. "Can you go take care of Hank?" she asked.

Booth cringed "Oh, Uh, my back. And, I need to go and uh. Sorry" he walked as quickly as his back would allow, to the door "call of nature. Must have been all the egg nog. Or something" he said as he exited the room as quickly as he could, sidestepping over Hank who was toddling into the bedroom, a clearly full nappy dragging down his PJ bottoms.

An all too familiar stench wafted across Brennan's face. She pulled her arm away from her eyes and turned her head towards the smell. Hank was standing at the side of the bed, his chubby hands covered in "Hank! Don't touch Mommy's bed!" she yelled as she grabbed at Hank's arms, foiling his attempt to wipe his hands on her white quilt. She swung her legs off the bed and turned Hank around, still holding his arms, and walked him towards the nursery, then changed her mind and turned towards the bathroom.

"Booth? We're coming in!" she yelled through the door, pushing it open. Booth was washing his hands at the sink and turned to see them coming through the door.

"Ahh! Oh. Hank! Oh!" his hands covering his nose and mouth. "I'll just go make sure Christine doesn't start opening any presents yet while you, uh, sort. All that. Out" he said, waving his hand around in a random fluttering, directed at his son. "God, how does such a small human being, make such a large"

"Thank you Booth. I'm sure I don't need your vivid description. I have to deal with this now." she said, pushing Hank towards the bathtub. "I'm just going to hose him down" she said lifting him into the tub fully clothed.

"Bones. You're not going to just. You know. In my tub?" Booth said, perplexed at what he saw was about to happen.

"Well, how else would you suggest I handle this? It isn't the first time I've had to do this" Brennan retorted turning on the cold tap and adjusting the hot to make sure the water wasn't too warm.

"You've done that before? In the tub? Oh jeez! Bones! I soak in that tub!" Booth said, his face screwed up.

"Well I clean it afterwards Booth. With a strong hospital grade disinfectant. You're perfectly safe." She replied as she began peeling Hanks pyjama pants down, her face screwing up with disgust.

"Ugh Hank!" Booth said as he exited the bathroom.

"Can we open presents now Daddy?" Christine asked excitedly, bouncing up and down on Booth's favourite leather chair.

"Well we just need to wait for Mommy and Hank." Booth said, looking at the doorway where Brennan was with Hank wrapped in a towel.

Hank was wriggling so hard that Brennan almost dropped him out of the towel. His little body slipped down to the floor and she reluctantly let go of the little naked boy who ran to his father. Booth spun him around quickly to check that all was clear then hoisted him up into his arms. "Now that's better Hank! All cleaned up!" he chuckled.

"Cleen Daddy" Hank laughed, patting his naked belly proudly.

Brennan shook her head "I'll grab his clothes. You can deal with dressing him. I still need to go clean the bath." she said, retreating into the hallway.

Booth shuddered and held his son up, his hands supporting him under his arms "You little mess maker!" he said, wiggling the little boy from side to side.

Christine burst out laughing "His willy is shaking!" she said, covering her eyes.

Booth burst out laughing and pulled his son back to rest on his hip "Well, what else is it supposed to do?" he said grinning at his daughter who was now looking between two fingers.

Max was sitting on the sofa, his leg jigging up and down.

"You got a twitch Max?" Booth asked as he put Hank down, but had to quickly grab him again as he made straight for the first present he could grab and tore the corner of the wrapping. "Woah there tiger. We have to get you dressed first and wait for Mommy."

"Bones Mama!" Hank yelled.

Everyone laughed loudly.

"Did he just call me Mama?" Bones said, coming into the room just in time to hear her son finally call her by name.

"Well. Sorta. Yes, he did." Booth said.

"Bones Mama! Cloves" Hank said again enthusiastically reaching for his mother who was holding a pair of red overalls and a green turtleneck.

She frowned, then smiled "Well, he's getting there I suppose." She said handing the clothes to Booth, along with a nappy, singlet and socks then frowned "I thought your back was still playing up?"

"Uh, well, maybe that hot shower" he started to try to wriggle out of telling Brennan that his back was actually feeling fine.

"Mommy! Can we open presents now?" Christine asked, her voice pleading.

"Saved by the bell!" Max chuckled, making Booth flash him a frown.

"Give me five minutes, then I promise we can start opening presents. After Aunty Angela, Uncle Jack and Michael Vincent get here" she said. "And I'm sure Uncle Russ and Aunty Amy and the girls won't be sleeping much longer after all the noise we've been making.

"Noooo!" Christine cried.

"Come on Bones. Do we really need to wait? It's already eight o'clock. What time are they going to arrive?" Booth said, pulling a singlet deftly over Hanks head, and threading his arms through the armholes.

"We agreed Booth. We would open presents together" she said walking away.

Booth frowned and looked at Max, shrugging "We agreed to that?" he asked Max.

Max shook his head and shrugged back at Booth "I have no idea" he said.

"Can Christine at least open one gift from Santa?" Booth yelled after Brennan.

"No!" was her adamant reply.

Christine threw herself onto the sofa next to Max and buried her face in his lap "Worst Christmas ever!" she yelled, making Booth and Max laugh.

* * *

Russ and Amy finally came into the living room about fifteen minutes later, wrapped in matching bright green quilted dressing gowns, trimmed with what looked like red felt baubles. Booth blinked several times, his mouth twitching at the corners.

"I know Booth. You don't even need to say anything." Russ said, holding up a hand, then looked behind him. Turning back to Booth he whispered "The girls gave them to us for Christmas. We HAVE to wear them so we don't hurt their"

"Dad! You and Mom are wearing your gifts!" Emma said, her smile wide.

"Awww No! Daddy. They got to open presents already!" Christine flopped on her back on the sofa, dramatically waving her arms in the air then letting them flop down loudly.

"Well that's _their_ family. Mommy said not until everyone is here. That's how we are doing _our_ Christmas" Booth said, trying to sound like he agreed.

Hank reluctantly let Booth finish dressing him, although Booth did have to chase him across the room once or twice.

"There we go. Now Hank, no presents. Not yet!" he yelled once again rescuing a gift from the destructive clutches of young Hank. "Here, go to Poppy Max" Booth added, dropping Hank onto Max's lap.

"Mommy! There's someone at the door! I'll get it!" Christine yelled excitedly running to the door as the doorbell rang, and was followed by a loud knock.

"Merry Christmas!" Angela called out as Christine opened the door.

"Aunty Angela! I've been waiting for _hours_ and _hours_ for you. Mommy! We can open our presents now!" Christine screamed out as she ran towards the tree.

Booth cut her off, grabbing her around the waist and hoisting her into the air "Hold onto your horses young lady. We're going to let Uncle Jack at least get through the door before we start" he said.

Hodgins finally edged through the door. He was laden down with two of the biggest Christmas sacks Christine had ever seen. Her eyes grew so big they appeared to take up her entire face.

"WOW!" she said. "Are there any presents in there for me?" she asked.

"Christine! Where are your manners!" Brennan said as she came into the room.

Booth nodded and then tipped his head in the direction of the bathroom "All clear? No nasty surprises?" he said furtively.

Brennan frowned "If you're asking if I cleaned up all the faeces? Yes. The bathroom is clean and santitised" she replied.

Angela burst out laughing "Let me guess. Hank had a nappy full this morning? Oh, I remember those days"

Brennan grinned "Angela. Merry Christmas! Jack. Hello Michael Vincent. Merry Christmas!" she said, bending down to kiss Michael Vincent's cheek. "He's looking more and more like you" she said to Angela s she stood up and held out her arms to her best friend.

"Merry Christmas sweetie" Angela said hugging Brennan tightly. She let go and turned to Booth holding out her arms "Come here big guy" she said walking towards him.

"Uh, Merry Christmas Angela" Booth said cringing as he was hugged around his chest. He patted her back awkwardly, then when she let go he began to exhale but was suddenly grabbed from the side, and found himself in a man hug by Hodgins.

"Merry Christmas man!" Hodgins said, pressing his face against Booths shoulder and squeezing him.

Booth flinched and closed his eyes, his mouth tight and downturned, he lifted his shoulders trying to wriggle out of Hodgins grasp unsuccessfully.

"Ok. Yeah. That's. Happy Christmas. Can you let go now?" Booth said.

Hodgins released him and then punched him in the arm "Are you excited for a great day?" Hodgins said, then bent down and lifted Christine up into the air. "And are YOU excited?" he asked her, kissing her cheek.

"Your whiskers tickle!" Christine giggled as Hodgins repeatedly kissed her cheek.

"Merry Christmas everyone!" Hodgins said, waving his hand in greeting.

He put Christine down and smiled as she and Michael Vincent sat down at the base of the Christmas Tree. "Look at those two. One day I'm going to have a sweet little girl too" he said wistfully.

Booth looked at the two children who were giggling together pointing at parcels.

Hank started wriggling and squealing. "Mikal Mikal!" he yelled.

Max put Hank down and the little boy ran over to Michael Vincent, throwing himself at the older boy.

"Well, looks like you're Mr Popular today!" Hodgins said, laughing "Maybe we'll have another boy too!" he said, then clapped Booth on the shoulder, and looked at Max "Any of your Eggnog handy?" he asked.

Max jumped up off the sofa. "I thought you'd never ask!" he said.

Brennan frowned "Dad! Don't you think it's a bit early in the day?" she asked.

Max snorted and shook his head "It's Christmas Day Tempe. There's no such thing as too early." He retorted.

"That's what you think" Brennan muttered under her breath.

He and Hodgins walked to the kitchen together. Christine was holding Hank as tightly as she could to stop him diving into the pile of gifts under the tree "Mommy! Hank is going to break everything!" she wailed.

Booth came to the rescue and picked up Hank again, who was kicking and yelling "Pesent!"

"Can we get this party started?" Booth asked Brennan. "I can't do this much longer" he added, as he struggled with the wriggling child in his arms.

"Dad? Jack? We're going to start now!" Brennan called out.

"Don't get your panties in a twist!" Max said as he walked towards them with a tray, holding a large jug and six mugs. "Priorities young lady!" he added, holding out the tray for her to take a mug of eggnog. "Angela? How are you honey" he said, kissing Angela's cheek as she took a mug. He then offered the tray to Russ and Amy before turning to Booth..

Booth threw his hands up and clapped "Yes! Thankyou Max. OK. Can I give the go ahead?" he took a mug and turned to Brennan, holding his drink up.

Brennan smiled and nodded.

"OK kids! We're going to do this!" Booth said, pulling a Santa hat out of his pocket and pulling it onto his head. "And I'm going to play Santa" he said, sitting down onto the floor with Hank between his legs, and he began handing out gifts.

"Christine. You can open the first present" he said grinning as he placed a large box in front of the little girl.

"What about me?" Michael Vincent said, his mouth downturned.

Booth rummaged around under the tree and placed a parcel in front of him. "OK, you can open one too" watching the little boy smile. He grabbed another present and placed it on the floor "Come on Hank, you can open one as well" he said.

One by one, all the gifts were unwrapped by their recipients. There were ooh's and aah's as gifts were shown off. Finally Booth stood up and waded through the ocean of wrapping paper on the floor.

"There's one last present. Santa told me where he left it. I'll be right back" he said, touching his nose.

"Who is it for?" Michael Vincent asked excitedly.

"Is it for Hank?" Christine yelled.

Booth came back pushing a huge box along the floor, his grin was almost as large as the box.

"Christine. This has your name on it!" he said.

Christine squealed and jumped up off the floor and ran over to her father, her hands clapping as she jumped around the box. "What is it? What is it?" she screamed.

Booth shrugged "How do I know? Santa said it was for you. Top secret" he replied.

"How do I open it?" Christine asked, as she tried to find a way to open the box.

Booth grinned. "How about I do this?" he said as he began to lift the box upwards, revealing a bright yellow bike with pink and blue streamers hanging from the handlebars and a white basket on the front, and training wheels, securely attached to the back wheel.

Christine almost fell to the floor as she screamed an ear shattering scream "It's just exactly what I asked for!" she cried as Booth placed the empty box to the side.

Christine grabbed the handle bars and climbed onto the seat and rang the bell that was attached to the handle bars. "It's just what I wanted" she said again grinning at her mother.

"Well, according to the myth, I believe this means you must have been on a good list" Brennan said. "And apparently, so has Hank!" she laughed as Hank honked the horn that was on the front of the toddler pedal and push car he had gotten. It was a fire truck, bright red, with a white ladder on the back and big black wheels. There was also a winding handle that made a sound like a firetruck siren when it was turned. Booth and Brennan had agreed not to show him how to turn it for the moment.

"Look Hank! It's a siren" Michael Vincent said as he turned the handle.

Booth jumped "Michael! We weren't going to"

The wail of the siren cut him off, and filled the room making Hank squeal with laughter. He, of course, immediately grabbed at the handle and in no time had worked out how to turn it. Booth cringed and closed his eyes for a minute. He opened them and looked at Brennan.

"Maybe we can tape it down so he can't turn it?" he said.

Brennan laughed and shrugged "It was only a matter of time before he worked it out Booth. He's very smart." she said. "He's like I was when I was his age, isn't he Dad. I was extremely advanced as a baby. I remember Mom said I was a baby genius?"

Max grinned and nodded "He does remind me of you" he said.

"Don't encourage her" Booth said laughing.

Brennan pulled a face at Booth. The families sat around, watching their children play with their new toys. They exchanged their own gifts to each other, and simply enjoyed the morning with their children.

* * *

The doorbell rang and Christine jumped up and ran to the door, pulling it open "Uncle James!" she screamed "I got a bike! And I got a barbie! Where's Jessica? And I got a microscope! And I got a hockey stick! And I got"

"Woah! Sounds like you cleaned up Christine! I guess you got so much you won't need this then?" Aubrey said, holding a brightly wrapped present.

"NO! I definitely want it!" she yelled.

Aubrey squatted down and said "First I need some sugar". Christine giggled and kissed his cheek, then took the offered gift.

"James. You spoil her." Brennan said walking to the door and kissing him on the cheek as he handed her a gift for Hank. "Welcome. Come in and join the party." She added looking past him "No Jessica?"

Christine's scream drew everyone's attention at that moment "It's Anna and Elsa dress ups and a sing along CD!" she screamed, tears welling in her eyes "It's exactly what I wanted!"

Booth flinched "oh yay. exactly what we wanted" he muttered under his breath dreading the hours of Let It Go they would have to endure again.

Aubrey walked into the living room, lifting a hand to wave "Good to know that's a hit! Hi all. Merry Christmas everyone!" he said, then turned to Brennan with a shrug "Last minute, she got a call from her cousin. They invited her to come have Christmas with them and her grandmother who's not doing too well. She sends her regards. And I have a couple of gifts for the kids from her in the car.

Booth shook Aubrey's hand. He turned to Russ and Amy "This is James Aubrey. I work with him" he said.

"And I'm going to marry him when I'm big" Christine added, her blue eyes batting at Aubrey, who laughed and punched Booth in the arm "Hear that? We're gonna get married. Dad" he winked.

Booth blanched "Don't even make jokes. Christine isn't ever getting married. Are you baby? You're going to be a top lawyer when you grow up, aren't you?" he said.

"No. She's going to be a world class forensic scientist" Brennan said.

"You're all wrong. I'm going to be a mommy!" she said, making Booth grab at his forehead.

"Well I'm sure my grand daughter is going to be a huge success at what ever she decides to do, in spite of her parent's" Max laughed.

Booth shook his head "I'm going to the bathroom." he said walking out of the living room, his head shaking backwards and forwards "a mommy. a mommy!" he groaned.

Aubrey nodded, then looked up as a ringing caught his attention. "Ooh, is that lunch?" he said hopefully. "Oh, no. It's the doorbell"

The doorbell rang again, making everyone turn.

Brennan answered the door with a scream, and returned to the living room, a bright smile on her face, her arm linked through that of her cousin Margaret. They were followed by a tall thin man with greying hair, carrying a tiny girl.

"Everyone, you remember my cousin Margaret? This is her husband Barry and their daughter Marcie! I can't believe you're here!" Brennan said turning and hugging Margaret again, emotion choking her voice.

Booth smiled as he watched his wife's face light up as she took the little girl from her father and give her a hug, then squat down and introduce her to her cousin. Hank of course, conscious that he had some competition for the spot of youngest, cutest child in the room, barged towards them and made himself known with a fist to Marcie's cheek, sending the little girl into a frenzy of crying and screaming.

Brennan, mortified, handed her to her mother, profusely apologising for her brutish son's behaviour before picking up Hank and scolding him, pointing at Marcie and telling him to say sorry.

Hank of course laughed loudly and yelled "Bones!" making Brennan blush.

"Booth, do something with your son please!" she said as she handed Hank to him. Booth was having trouble keeping a straight face.

Christine diffused the tension by yelling "Can we eat already?" which made everyone burst out laughing, allowing Booth to let his grin out.

"Good idea kiddo!" Max said, scooping Marcie out of Margaret's arms and jigging her up and down. "Marcie Parcie! Are you my Marcie Parcie?" he sang to her, making the little girl stop crying and begin to giggle.

"Thankyou Uncle Max" Margaret said, double checking Marcie's cheek which was showing a bright red welt where Hank's fist had connected.

"She's fine. Trust me. I remember you and Tempe going at it when you were about three and she was maybe seven. Now that was a fight!" Hank laughed.

"Oh, wait. I think I remember that! I ended up with my front tooth knocked out and a black eye!" Brennan said, her hand cupping her chin as she scrunched up her face.

"I didn't actually knock out your tooth. It was loose anyway. I just sped up the process" Margaret countered.

"What about my black eye?" Brennan asked.

"Well. I. Ok. Yes, I probably did do that. But you were so mean to me!" Margaret said.

"I was not!"

"You were!"

"Now now you two. Let's set a good example for the littlies by not knocking out any teeth or blackening any eyes" Max said, setting Marcie down on the ground.

Booth looked at Hank, his face stern, his voice matching "Now you be nice Hank. No more hitting." he said.

"Baby!" Hank yelled pointing at Marcie.

"She's no more a baby than you are young man. Be nice. Or Daddy will put you to bed." He growled.

"No Bed!" Max howled. "Be Good"

Booth set his son down on the floor and patted his head "Good man"

Brennan looked around. The living room was full of some of the most important people in her life. She felt a wave of emotion and choked down her tears and smiled. "If everyone would like to take a seat. I'll get lunch served!" she announced.

Angela jumped up "I'll give you a hand Sweetie" she said.

The doorbell chimed at that moment.

"Oh no" Booth muttered his eyes staring at the door, willing whoever it was to just disappear.

"I wonder who that is?" Brennan said as she walked to the door and opened it.

"I hope I'm not intruding. We arrived a day early and I just couldn't bear sitting at the hotel room. Oh! Wait, you've got a houseful. I'm sorry. Don't worry. Perhaps we can come visit tomorrow?" a voice said.

"Nonsense! You will not spend Christmas Day on your own!" Brennan said, stepping aside. "Everyone! It's Daisy!"

Angela ran to the door and wrapped Daisy and her son up in a hug. "I can't believe you're here!" she said.

Jack walked up and held out his arms.

"Little Lance is a bit shy normally" Daisy said, then was surprised as he leaned towards Hodgins, allowing him to lift him from his mother's arms.

"Kids love me Daisy." he grinned and walked into the room with Lance Sweets' son grinning at the people in the room.

Booth stared at the little boy and felt a lump in his throat "He looks so much like him" he managed to say as Daisy walked towards him.

"I know. And more each day. Don't you Lancey" she said.

Booth frowned "I thought. I mean. Isn't his name Seeley?" he said, trying not to sound hurt.

Daisy blushed "Well, it is, but. Well he looks so much like his father. It just seems right to call him Lance." she said, laying a hand on Booth's arm "Please don't be offended"

Booth shook his head, "I'm not offended." he said, then added "Honestly. I agree. He is definitely a mini Lance." he said, nodding. He really meant it. He could tell, by looking at that little boy that there was no way she couldn't call him by his father's name. He was Lance Sweets, from his dark eyes, to his long thin face, the same expressive mouth and the shock of floppy dark brown hair.

He reached out and gave Daisy a hug, which surprised almost everyone in the room "Welcome. I'm glad you're both here" he said, then looked around the room. "I'm glad you're all here. I can't think of a better way to celebrate Christmas, than to be surrounded by the people we love the most in our lives." Booth grinned widely, his arms outstretched as if he was going to hug the group of people as a whole. "Max, come and help me carve the meat." Booth said.

Angela grabbed Brennan's arm and grinned at her "Come on, the natives are restless and hungry!"

Mountains of food lay along the long trestle table that Booth and Brennan had set up down the centre of their open plan living/dining room. Aubrey had added another chair to the table and shuffled the settings to make room for another plate.

Booth stood up as everyone took their place at the table. He raised a glass, signalling he was going to make a toast. Everyone grabbed their glass and held them high.

"Like I said before. Bones and I are glad you are all here. We started out thinking we were going to have this quiet day. Just us and the kids." he looked along the table, seeing the smiles on his friends faces. On the faces of his children, and the children of his friends. And most of all, the smile on Brennan's face. The most important smile of all.

"And I know that the song says have yourself a merry little Christmas. But really?" he grinned, "This big loud Christmas is so much better! Now let's eat!"


End file.
